In the movie "Canadian Bacon," written and directed by Michael Moore, authority figures operating north of the border are depicted as exceedingly polite and accommodating to a fault, even in the face of an invading American commando team.

NEW YORK - The Jockeys Insurance Fairness Act of 2006, a bill introduced to the House of Representatives on Thursday, is an ill-conceived, overreaching, and dangerous piece of legislation. It would imperil simulcasting and involve the federal government in regulating racing in ways that the industry would soon regret.

If the folks at Louisiana Downs had pulled the plug on the Super Derby after the Vth running, back in 1984, instead of making it all the way to this Saturday's XXVIIth, they would have been obliged to backdate a name change and just call the darn thing Pincayapalooza.

If the folks at Louisiana Downs had pulled the plug on the Super Derby after the Vth running, back in 1984, instead of making it all the way to this Saturday's XXVIIth, they would have been obliged to backdate a name change and just call the darn thing Pincayapalooza.

NEW YORK - New York horseplayers have been puzzled by a recent parimutuel mystery. If it were a Perry Mason novella, it might be called "The Case of the Perplexing Pick-Six Probables."

The odds that two Thoroughbreds from opposite sides of the continent could spend less than a week stabled next to each other in unfamiliar surroundings and then be killed by the same rare equine disease less than one year later are staggering. Absolutely staggering.

Take the bet.

TUCSON, Ariz. - The success of Horse Greeley in the Del Mar Futurity brought to mind the advice of his namesake Horace, who told youth of a different century to "Head west, young man," or words to that effect.

My advice is different: Head north.

Much of what is happening today of significance - particularly in enforcing tough integrity rules - is happening north of the border, in Canada.

Not only are racing infractions bringing harsh penalties, but social transgressions are bringing stiff suspensions as well, as today's news indicates.

It is one thing to pay tribute to the stables of bygone days, giving their owners a plaque, a statue, or just a nice luncheon and a round of appreciative applause. It is quite another thing, however, when those classic stables of the past keep coming back for more.

ETOBICOKE, Ontario - In 2001, a Canadian dollar was worth only 62 cents in the United States, and many American horsemen stopped thinking of Canadian purses as being competitive with those at top-tier American tracks. As of this past Friday, however, the Canadian dollar is now a little more than 89 cents American, so Sunday's $1 million (Canadian) Woodine Mile will be worth $894,453.70 at current conversion rates.

NEW YORK - A widely accepted "fact" of contemporary racing is that the winning percentages of its top trainers have increased dramatically and suspiciously over the last generation. Today's most successful trainers are supposedly winning races at unnatural and unholy rates, unattainable by even the Hall of Fame horsemen of previous eras, thus proving that the game must not be on the level.